To Be A Successful MANAGER
Without Them — Please Decline!
I have evaluated over 8000+ individuals in more than 7700+ hours in my previous job. Then I read hundreds of scientific reports on Personality psychology and human emotion.
And this is my guide to how you can become a successful manager in any company or organization. I hate to break it to you. But not all people are meant to be managers or leaders.
You simply cannot teach this, no matter how much you believe that to be true.
Here are the basic components of a good manager that you need to have:
Lesson #1: Listening
Surprisingly, the majority of people think they are good listeners.
Well, I am here to tell you that you are most likely a crappy listener. And here is why.
Many people suffer from imposter syndrome. Which in short means that you do not think you should have the job you are in because you do not know what you are doing. That might be true in most cases.
Most people will think about what to reply to when someone is speaking to them instead of paying attention and trying to be curious enough to understand what the other person is saying.
You will most likely end up coming up with replies while trying to listen.
Humans have a poor ability to do two things at the same time. In fact when you do a task switching between five things. You end up losing 75% of the time to just switching.
Thinking of a reply when listening is a bad idea and science confirms it.
Instead, you should use those extrusions on either side of your head called ears.
Lesson #2: Be curious and understand the context
Step 1: Context
Understand the context:
- Who is the person talking about?
- What is the person talking about?
- Where is the location of the thing the person is talking about?
- When is this thing the person is talking about taking place?
- Why is a person talking to you about this thing? — Most important.
If you have not established these five parts of what the other person is saying. You do not understand the context of what the person is trying to communicate.
Therefore you do not understand it well enough to even start thinking of a reply.
Step 2: Summarise and confirm
Your first reply however is never something you just thought of.
You need to start by confirming that you understand. And that is only done by reformulating what the other person said and asking if you have understood the person or not. If the other person confirms that you have understood. Then you move on to the next step.
Step 3: Your reply
When you confirmed you understood the other person. Then is it time for you to think of and formulate your reply. Let’s face it.
It is gibberish before you have done all the steps before this.
The person will see you as a person, not to come to if they ever need help.
It also diminishes honesty and trust. The experts are clear about “Relationship leadership” being one of the two styles that employees thrive with and crave. So if you think you will be a good manager without being a good listener. Think again.
You will end up a failure in most cases since your staff will say bad things about you, which in turn, will end up in your manager's ear.
Lesson #3: Empathy
Empathy is two parts.
Part 1: Cognitive empathy
Understanding what emotion the other person is having. That can be done through the auditory system, ocular system, touch, olfactory system, temperature, and lastly pressure.
Part 2: Affective empathy
Responding with the correct emotion towards the other person.
If you are too low in empathy.
You will fail to understand the emotions state in the other person. You need to understand the context, which empathy is part of, the other person is conveying to you, for you to maintain relationship leadership. The other person might otherwise see you as callous.
Part 3: Callous
Being callous is one of the most common traits of an office psychopath. I think you can see that your days in a company or a managerial role will be short and less fun.
Lesson #4: Personality
Step 1: Take test
Take the HEXACO personality test
Step 2: Others do test on you
Let your partner or closest friend do the test on you.
Step 3: Calculate
You then ask for the results from whoever you let do the HEXACO test on you. Add their results to a table side by side with yours. In the last column, you write the averages between your score and the other person's score on you.
The average is closer to the truth than what you tell yourself you are.
Lesson #5: Understand human personality
You need to understand human personality intricately.
If you do not. You will be stuck in a conflict between you and your manager. As well as between you and your employees.
Understanding your personality and that of your manager and your employees is the basic knowledge you need to succeed as a manager.
Lesson #6: Dark Tetrad Personalities
This is the only important piece of human psychology that I put on a pedestal.
The reason why is that Dark Tetrad personalities are everywhere. When you understand the components of Dark Tetrad Personalities you will see the sub-clinical symptoms in yourself and other people. That gives you the ability to stay away from trouble and most of all protect others from you if you have many of the sub-clinical traits.
By identifying if a person is Honest & Humble or not, you will have the ability to spot malicious people around you and therefore live a longer life and be happier every day.
Summary
Learn to listen and be honest with yourself. Learn what personality you are. Understand if you have a problem with understanding other people through the knowledge of understanding your level of empathy.
But if you are Emotionally stable and high in Conscientious, Open to exploration, Honest & Humility. Then by all means. You have the very foundation of becoming a great manager and leader in any shape or form.
If you like to watch a video on how to understand personality then go watch my video “How To Understand Personality” and “How To Understand Personality in Detail!”
P.S. (I’m so grateful for your support!)
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